adoption
If medical treatment doesn’t feel the right way for you to become a parent, you might consider adoption. There are many children currently waiting to be adopted in the UK. This can be a very rewarding way to enjoy family life.
Adoption is not an easy route, though, and is not right for everyone. Many of the children waiting for adoption have had to cope with a lot of upset in their lives. Some can be quite emotionally damaged and insecure as a result. There are very few babies and toddlers for adoption. It is usually slightly older children who need adoptive families so you miss out on their early lives.
Some people go to other countries to adopt and then bring the children back to the UK. This can bring even more challenges and needs to be thought through very carefully. Many countries have now stopped this type of adoption because so many adoptive families found it difficult to manage.
If you are interested in finding out more about adoption, you can ask:
- your social worker (if you have one)
- your local Social Services Department (they should be listed in the phone book under the name of your local council)
- one of the organisations in resources.
Some of the organisations have information packs about adoption and fostering. Single people and gay and lesbian couples are not excluded from adopting or fostering.
staying childless
Some people decide that they don’t want to have fertility treatment or adopt a child.
Many people cannot have children, through cancer or other medical reasons, or simply because the time never felt right. Most go on to enjoy life without children. Some people take an interest in the children of friends or other family members and perhaps become a special and much-loved ‘aunt’ or ‘uncle’.
Some people decide to go into jobs that bring them into a lot of contact with children – such as teaching, paediatric nursing or social work – and enjoy that. Other people find that contact with children is not high on their list of priorities and they can enjoy their adult lives with very little contact with children.
We are all different. If you find yourself feeling distressed at any point now or in the future at the idea of not being able to have your own children, there are professionals and organisations which are experienced in helping people to cope.
